Thai Bar-Girl Easy Translator
This was my first attempt at making a You Tube Video. The Title Thai Bar Girl Easy Translator is of course entirely facetious!! I know the Video is a little Ragged but I had great fun making it and will certainly be having another go!! After just having spent three Days in Pattaya I understand how incredibly easy it must be to Fall for any of these Gorgeous Thai Bar-Girls!!
Unless you are exceedingly careful the results of being Smitten by one of these Lovely Little Hustlers can be similar to being bitten by a Zombie!! Whilst when walking you may not look as if you have had a large “Trouser Accident” The way all Zombies do in the Movies!! You will almost certainly have lost the ability to think rationally!! And a Flashing Neon ATM sign will be clearly visible on your Forehead!!
Pattaya remains what it has been since someone first understood the enormous earning potential of Thai Pussy!! It is still a Raucous, Sleazy and Erotic Theme Park for Geriatric Westerners, joined now by Legions of Huge Russian Men. The Russians appear to be in the ascendancy. One can identify the Russians from afar by the gesticulations they make during prolonged Conversations held at full Volume. The Russians also appear to scowl for much of the time!!
As if a Metaphor for the “Battle of Stalingrad” the “Slavic Hordes” have swept the diminished German Divisions before them. I hardly heard one German accent during my stay. I think either the wealthy Germans stay Poolside in the Private Luxury of their Penthouse Condos, or have Surrendered Thailand entirely to the Russians and have gone in search of easy Sex in places like Brazil.
The Beaches are crammed with Gigantic Russians many of whom look as if they could have been contenders for Mr. Universe in their youth. These Monolithic Slavs, their Skin the Colour of Pale Oatmeal have come, with the passage of time to resemble not so much the Herculean Demi Gods of yesteryear but rather Flaccid approximation’s of “Jabba the Hut”
There are also sizable numbers of Russian Females on Display, Sizable again being the Key Word.These Ladies Vast Silhouette’s remind One of a Lumpy “Pillsbury Dough-Boy” , or “Michelin Man”, with Breasts which appear to have been Sculpted from the Ural Mountains. One imagines these Babushkas are not here for the Sex!! One can equally easily understand why the Russian Men might be attracted to the Thai Bar-Girls!!
There remain small enclaves of Hardened ( excuse the Suggestive Adjective!!) Western Sex Tourists, aging Flower Children, their Ravaged features testifying to a Lifetimes Substance Abuse!! And of course the Salt of the Earth Working Class British Piss Artists, who with the advent of cheap Package Holidays are able to make fools of themselves on a bigger Stage!!
All of which brings me to the arrival of Pattaya’s most recent and least liked Thrill Seekers, the Indians. Indians have arrived in fairly large numbers, unlike the Thai/Indians who run the “Armani Tailor Shops” these Guys are like everyone else Sex Tourists.I heard an Indian talking to a perfectly Polite, Smiling Server in McDonald’s in a manner which had he done this in some parts of the World would have earned him a very well deserved punch on the Nose!!
I am told by Thais that not only will 4/5 Indians sit in a Bar sharing One Drink, but that they also attempt this Tactic with the Thai Prostitutes!! My informant states that the Indians will pay One Girl for Sex. The Sex they have purchased however entails the poor Old Tart Servicing 4/5 Men for a single Fee!! While attempting these tactics in any decent (Sic) Girly-Bar would end with them being thrown out on their Ass, there are all too many “Short Time” Ladies on the street so desperate for Money that these Scumbags are allowed to get away with it!!
Pattaya, I am sure fulfills a useful function. And is essentially a resort where One goes in order to have Ones Sexual Fantasies Realized!! In describing the Participants I feel the need however to Paraphrase Oscar Wilde. “Pattaya is the Unsavory in pursuit of the Unscrupulous!!” When I return next year ( to Renew my Visa) I am going to try Jomtien. The next Resort along the Coast from Pattya,I am told it is far less Seedy with a much nicer Beach and altogether a more pleasant Place.